Don't mess with the Neiman Marxist

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

a new leaf

Same thing I wrote in my livejournal.

Well,I think my settlement into the life of a student has finally gelled, molded, whatever you want to call it. I was feeling a tiny bit unsure there for a minute, and doubting my abilities, life, etc. Now I feel more comfortable, adjusted to being very very poor, and content with the situation I am in. Wierd, I was trying to figure out what my problem was there for a minute. I begin the new year feeling truly happy, but taking time to get to know who this happy person is. That's actually pretty difficult. I had to question every friendship/relationship etc. that I have.
My friends, for the time being, I am very comfortable with my life.Now I can work on things, and have some new goals to stride towards.
Goals:
* Continue to do well in school, and stay motivated.
* Focus on Jitney, and challenging myself to stretch my vocal style, and continue in this really awesome new direction we're heading in.Performances soon my friends, performances soon.
* Begin writing and composing for my solo side project that has been sitting in my head molding for the past year and a half or so. I think I'm at the point in my life where I can finally make that happen. Me + Folk music = my new project.
* Begin volunteering in some facet of helping the mentally disabled, I need experience and need to see what avenue I want to take my career into (music therapy)
* Buy a full keyboard digital piano
* Quit smoking
* Start a Kenny Loggins cover band
* Travel
* Start a relationship with Howard University, so I can get in, when I apply next year
* Read 1 non school book a week
* Lose weight in a healthy way
* Train Junebugg to jump thru a hula hoop
* Learn how to be a better friend, stop the charade, and be real, honest, and sincere 100% of the time.
These are my goals for 2006.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

hmm

This morning I woke up way past the time planned, ended up being 20 minutes late for biology (I had a quiz today) and now feel extremely angry and dissatisfied with myself.
As far as the quiz goes, I think I did alright.
I may be the only member in the household in school, but I feel that because of that, I'm the one that has to compromise around every body else's stuff. All I need is one quiet room. It never seems to work out that way. I mean thank god I chose not to study last night, or it would have been a real mess. I was trying to relax though, and that was not accomplished.
Maybe I'm just feeling bratty.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Welcome to 2006

The year you get your life back together.
I'm on day 2 of my return to college. So far so good. I will be challenged and humored, I will grow from this, and I'm still feeling very good about life in general.
Yes there are some adjustments, and I find myself annoyed often, but that doesn't mean I'm not happy, I'm just living my life.

2005 brought me a lot of pain.
2006, so far has brought me in these past 18 days. Hope, happiness, progress.
I'm excited to see what else this new year will bring, I know for a fact that two new lives are on their way, and that's extremely exciting.

I'm finally doing it y'all.
Finally.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Things that end with the letter a

these following things:

ikea
chick fil a
hula
grandpa

these things have made me happy today.
Tonight I go out to east atlanta to see my friends band play.

all better

So tonight, made up for last night.
My boyz = love.
L O V E
mothafuckas.
Yeah.
So okay, my mom is probably pissed that I had the car until 4 am, but I couldn't help it, I was with my babies, and they didn't even want me to go home, they wanted me to stay at the new house, but I knew my mother would kick my ass if I did, mainly 'cause I have her car, which is probably all for the best, 'cause me staying over there would probly not been the best. ANYWAY
Am I a bit tipsy right now? yes!
That's only because I had a beer when I got home.
Is this home? I don't know anymore.
I have all these pictures of my dog with me.
I miss my dog so much, it's kind of freaking me out. I had a dream about her last night.
I want to see my dog.

So there was this girl at the bar tonight, and she was WASTED, it was actually kind of awful to watch, Jamie and I both were like oh shit, first she fell really hard like knocking over several chairs and almost a whole table, then she'd make out with this irish dude, and then these dudes from georgia tech claimed to know her, and they're all like 'oh she's all right', and we're like. Jesus mf christ. no she's not, then she'd puke somewhere, leave the bar come back, fall over again. I mean it was sad. then she tried to start a fight with me and Jamie, and we're like Noooooo, I don't know. That bitch was crazy. I don't know if I've ever seen anyone that publicly drunk before. I just hope she ends up okay tonight. I mean hot damn. I hope her friends or whatever, are making sure she gets home. She was like beyond wasted.

Anyway, we made a tower of PBR. That was fun.
Then we knocked it over.
Ooops.

I baked cookies earlier with my mom and AMy, they turned out very very good. I was very proud, I am not known for my baking skills, chocolate chip and sugar. I was with two experts though, that probably helped. Lord knows, the snokilla can't back.

Also, nicknames came up tonight, mainly my oldone from highschool, the Heffa, I told them my new one. The Snokilla. Jamie is all like, is that 'cause you hate white people so much? and I thought I was going to fall off my chair and join the ranks of drunk crazy girl, 'cause that shit was hilarious.
My life is awesome.
Yeah, I think I'm just drunk.
But yeah. who knew?

love.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

Wierd night last night

Last night my heart felt a little heavy, and I got my feelings hurt really bad. I have to brush it all aside, 'cause it's really not all that bad. Sometimes i have to take a breath, and just let things be, omit the negative and the drama, 'cause I honestly just don't have room for it, and in reality, I have a lot of love surrounding me. Alot. I'm really thankful for that, no matter where I am I have a whole lot of love.
So hurt feelings aside and a pedicure and journey to Narnia later, my mother and I find ourselves at a bar near her house around midnight or so. It was so awesome, 'cause I got to drink blueberry beer, and mom and I got into talking shit, and it felt really good, 'cause talking shit always ends up being really productive, like she always has a really positive solution, or she'll manage to make you feel really good about yourself and your strengths, I mean she and I have our moments, but she truly is one of my greatest friends. Maybe it's that whole unconditional love thing. I dunno.
We had a good time.

I was riddled with very strange dreams all night though, a nightmare really. I dreamed about Junebugg, and all sorts of people that have been in my life over the years, and the end of the dream was just downright disturbing.

It's all good today though, Amy is coming over later, and I think baking cookies might be in the cards tonight. Could be a disaster, 'cause it is no secret that this girl cannot bake. Amy however is good at such things, as is my mother, so maybe their strengths will over power my weakness.
We shall see, they'll make a baker out of me yet.

It's almost christmas.
That's exciting.

S

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

I can't baleed this...

So.
Last night I stayed over at Amy's house out in Stone mountain, we decided this morning that we would go get breakfast at the waffle house by her place.

So we're eating our eggs and bacon, and the song 'Hey Ya' comes on the jukebox, the waitress mentions to the table behind us that the singer of the song is sitting at the counter.
I'm like "WHAT?" and turn around and what do you know there's andre 3000 wearing a flannel lumberjack shirt and a kangol.
Amy and I get to giggling, I mean seriously. At a waffle house. Crazy. in stone mountain. Crazier.
I decide that I need to smoke a cigarette and step outside and give Bradley a call, 'cause I wanted to see how he was doing with the whole Ny transit strike thing, find out he has to walk 60 freaking blocks to work, and we're all flipping out on the phone over andre 3000, so I'm about to go inside, and who do I run right into???? who???? but andre 3000, he was all polite, he's like 'I'm so sorry' and then holds the door open for me, so I'm all like "Thank you so much" I'm all smiles man, then I'm like ' I really love your music, it's truly amazing, I've been listening for a long time, thank you for it' and I'm looking in his eyes, and they are so sincere and warm, and he gives me the most sincere "Thank you' then we stared at each other for a little bit, and I go back inside.

WOOOOHOOOOO! IT WAS SOOOO COOL!!!!!! I mean I wasn't going to go talk to him earlier, 'cause I mean he obviously just wanted to eat breakfast with his son in waffle house. His son was adorable by the way. But I got to anyway. Yeah eh eh eh eh eh.

So today in history.

The historic moment when the Snokilla met Andre 3000, and no the snokilla was not wearing gold lame or stilettos, she was wearing black yoga pants, a yellow gucci shirt and a bandanna over her head with no makeup and very chapped lips, talkin to her friend Brad on the phone.
I really wish I had a jitney cd at that moment, 'cause you know he would of listened to it.
DANG.

Sorry boys.

Now I'm off to Van Michael Salon to get my hair cut. I'm excited.
ATL holla.

Monday, December 19, 2005

Awful movies of 2005

So.
I just watched the movie "crash" with my mother, after making a wonderful dinner of shrimp scampi over angel hair pasta.

My mom and I yelled at the movie the entire time.
It insulted our intellegence, and was truly awful.
I mean seriously.
What a dumb movie.

Ugh.

I feel really disgusting now for even watching that movie, and so does my mom.

People of the world. 'Crash' is really bad. I don't understand that it's the same person behind 'Hustle and Flow' 'cause that was really good.

Gross.

children are beautiful

Something really wonderful happened to me today.
First, a little backstory.
I have a best friend, someone who knows me better then anyone else. We've been friends since we were 5 years old. Her name is Amy. I shouldn't just say we've been friends since we were 5, we've been best friends since then, and we've always made a point of it. We talk on the phone as much as we can, and we've always led very different lives, but the bond. I can't really describe it.

It's like a lifelong commitment, that we both honor and cherish, and it's really beautiful.
So amy. She has this daughter.
Jade.
and well Jade is one of the most amazing people I know, she's the first child I've ever known that I truly love. I mean when I first met her, when she was a few months old, we've had a special bond, and it's very important to me. I take my role as godmother very seriously, and it's truly a pleasure watching her grow up. She's just amazing.
I try to see her as much as possible, I really can only get to Atlanta like 2 or 3 times a year, but I always try to make it for her birthday, Christmas, and sometime around summer. It's very very important to me that she feels that I hold her as a very important and loved person, and that I support her, and am there for her.
She's 4.
So today, I dropped my mom off at work and headed towards stone mountain to see Amy and her husbands new house, and of course to see Jade.

I knocked on the door upon my arrival, and she answered it. All I know is that when she saw it was me, her eyes lit up, and she screamed MELISSA, and gave me the biggest hug, and she didn't want to stop hugging me or sitting in my lap. There was so much love, I wanted to laugh and cry all at once. We sang songs, and tap danced, and ran around, and she showed me all of her new stuff, and her new Strawberry Shortcake room.

There was so much love.

I mean. I don't know.

I think it might be one of the most wonderful moments in my life so far, the love of a child is so sweet and pure and beautiful. You can't help but feel warm all over, and I don't know. I just don't know. This amazing child is the product of my best friend, a truly amazing woman, I just don't know.

I just feel good.

I love children.

I also love my mother, and the grocery store by her house, that had raw deveined shrimp for $5 a pound, which gave us quite an amazing dinner, beautiful fresh, buttery shrimp.

Vacation=bliss.
Yes. Bliss.

_S.